Through the Rough Times

I started this blog to share my journey with mental illness, and I have to say that today was a very rough day. Fortunately, I did not have any psychosis or paranoia. However, I was depressed. I had a lot of flashbacks. I felt really lonely.

I don’t like being depressed at all. In fact, I try to be as positive as I can be, but some days are just plain difficult. Some days are hard to get through and today was one of those days for me.

I did some positive things to help get through my depression. I walked around a pond near my apartment a few times. There is an app for my phone called Charity Miles in which people can raise money for various charities by walking or running. I walked many miles today so I raised some money for Feeding America, a charity that fights hunger. Sometimes when the depression settles in, I try to do positive things for others. This was kind of a win win because as I walked, I also spent time with God.

I have to say that I know that God understands my frustration. He knows my pain. He knows my struggles. He understands my depression in a way that I don’t think anyone else can. And He can pick me up out of it. He can do the same for whatever you are going through…

During my final walk of the day, the rain finally stopped. It’s been raining all week and I haven’t had much lake time at all. The sky cleared up and I saw the sun. As the sky opened up, I felt God say to me, “It’s gonna be alright. Just take it day by day, step by step.”

Going through this life with severe mental illness and having survived everything I’ve survived, I have some off days. I have some days that I am upset. I cried quite a few times today. But God got me through today. And I am not in a hospital. So for that, I am very grateful. If you could please pray for me and that God continues to lift me out of this funk, I would greatly appreciate it. Thank you for reading my blog and for following me through this journey.