"God, if you are powerful enough to have done things differently, why didn't you? How can I accept your comfort and believe you want to heal my broken heart when you could have kept me from experiencing this sorrow in the first place? If you'd only given me what I wanted, neither of us would have been sad."
-Nancy Guthrie, Hearing Jesus Speak Into Your Sorrow
As I read this early this morning, I was reminded of times when I have asked God these questions. I will never forget when I was talking to a reverend as a teenager and she told me that God could have sent a lightning bolt at my father when he was abusing me, but God didn't.
Am I grateful for my sorrows? Am I grateful for the pain I've endured?
I can honestly say in a way, yes.
Why?
Let me share with you another quote...
"Paul recognized that all his suffering-being imprisoned, shiprwrecked, stoned, threatened, rejected, criticized, cold and hungry-allowed him to experience a special fellowship with Jesus."
-Nancy Guthrie, Hearing Jesus Speak Into Your Sorrow
And another one...
"Jesus is not a distant deity who knows nothing about the pain of disappointment and death. he knows firsthand. He understands.".
-Nancy Guthrie, Hearing Jesus Speak Into Your Sorrow
I have been abused, neglected, and homeless. I have experienced the loss of a brother at the early age of 25. I deal with multiple mental illnesses on a daily basis.
But I am making it, with the help of God.
I am thankful to Him that I am not alone in this fight. I am thankful to Him that he has brought people into my life to help me during my trials. As I look back and reflect on all of my trials, I can see the hand of God throughout all of it.
And am I happy that He didn't stop my trials, even though He could have?
In a way, yes.
Because I have a special fellowship with Him that I would not have otherwise.
"
No comments:
Post a Comment